Contented In Christ
This is an audio recording of a teaching given at our 2023 Women’s Retreat by Ashley Linder.
I’m thankful to be here with you and for the opportunity to work through together what it is to be content. And the contentment we’re after this weekend is specific to the believer - it’s true contentment.
I’ve been imagining a picture of a steady hand, even when our circumstances or emotions feel more like a roller coaster. And that kind of contentment is only possible in Christ. Oftentimes I feel like I’m in the thick of the struggle for contentment myself. Because it is one of those life-long practices or disciplines of learning what it is to be content in Christ. So this is not to say that I have arrived by any means, like Paul says in Phillipians, “Not that I’m already perfect.” I’m not an expert in contentment, but God is, and we have His word.
So today we’re going to focus on one of the go-to passages for contentment in Philippians. You may have heard this scripture many times before. But my hope is to use it to remind us, and to encourage us - because that’s how we continue to grow in Christ together. And as we do that, we ask God to do the work in us to teach us through His word.
As I thought about what I wanted to share about contentment in my own life, whether past or present battles in my heart, I realized it was far less of a matter of particular circumstances, and much more about a particular theme - there’s always something in my life I can feel discontent with. And something I’ve had to continuously apply God’s truth to. It can be big things or small things, or even good things that we really love. But we’re sinful and broken, and this is life, not heaven. So we all have those things - it doesn’t matter who you are, what stage of your life you find yourself in, or what you have or don’t have in your life, our hearts tend towards restlessness and discontentment.
We’ll spend most of our time in Philippians today, but I want to quickly read a poem first, because it’s just so relevant. This poem was passed to me, I don’t actually know where it came from, but it was written by a 14 year old boy. And having a just-turned-15-year-old step-son, I found it to be quite insightful for a young man of his age. It says:
“It was spring, but it was summer I wanted. The warm days and the great outdoors.
It was summer, but it was fall I wanted. The colorful leaves, and the cool, dry air.
It was fall but it was winter I wanted. The beautiful snow and the joy of the holiday season.
It was winter but it was spring I wanted. The warmth and the blossoming of nature.
I was a child but it was adulthood I wanted. The freedom and the respect.
I was 20 but it was 30 I wanted. To be mature and sophisticated.
I was middle-aged but it was 20 I wanted. The youth and the free spirit.
I was retired but it was middle age I wanted. The presence of mind without limitations.
My life was over, but I never got what I wanted.”
Take a moment to answer questions 1-3 on your question sheets:
What do you most often find yourself wanting in your life?
What do you ultimately want in your life?
Do they align? Why or why not?
The dictionary definition of contentment is, “a state of satisfaction.” And as I thought about that, I thought, “How often do we really achieve a ‘state’ of satisfaction in a steady, ongoing sense?” I think if we’re honest, that’s a struggle. Oftentimes just being satisfied in general is a struggle, and then maintaining a state of satisfaction, all the more so. And that’s why that poem is so relatable - because it’s true of every one of us. It’s really just a fill-in-the-blank for our own lives - I have “blank”, but if only I had “blank.” And what’s the lie waiting on the other side of that? – that then I would be truly satisfied.
And that’s not limited to us of course. The human heart has always fallen into this trap. We see examples of it all throughout the Bible:
Adam and Eve became discontent in the garden. They had everything, but they wanted the fruit from the only tree in the garden God said, “No,” to.
The Israelites became discontent in the wilderness after God miraculously saved them from Egypt. They complained and grumbled, and even built idol gods out of stuff to worship instead of Yahweh.
David was discontent when he wanted Bathsheba. So he took her as his own and had her husband killed in the process.
The disciples were in the very presence of Jesus, but they wanted to know which one of them was the greatest.
Time after time, a discontent heart has led God’s people astray.
So if contentment is a matter of satisfaction, then it must also be a matter of desire. Because the two go hand in hand - we have a desire, our desire is met and we’re satisfied. And then we ask, “Well, what about for the believer? As women of God, what does contentment look like for us?”
Yesterday we looked at Jeremiah Burroughs definition of contentment in The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment. He said:
“Christian contentment is that sweet, inward, quiet, gracious frame of spirit, which freely submits to and delights in God’s wise and fatherly disposal in every condition.”
Freely submits to and delights in God. And His will. In every condition. If we put the components of those two definitions together we have desire, submission to God, delighting in God, and satisfaction. As we venture through Philippians today, we’ll find all of those components. And the place to start is with desire. It’s really at the core, and from there the rest flows out. The Bible talks a lot about desire, and that desire leads us in one of two directions. It says our desires can be good or bad, and that those desires are opposite to each other. And so the outcomes are opposite also.
For instance, Galatians 5:17,
“For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh.”
It then goes on to list the works of the flesh - things like idolatry, impurity, envy, etc. Then Paul lists the opposite – the fruits of the Spirit, or desires of the Spirit of God: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. In James, we see the outcome of bad desire or wrong desire. He says:
“When desire has conceived it gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.” (James 1:15)
But on the other hand, the Bible is also full of instruction about good desire. Psalm 37:4 says:
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”
That describes delighting in God, and being satisfied, two of those components of contentment we just mentioned. Psalm 73 says:
“There is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.” (Psalm 73:25)
Desire is powerful. And I think that sometimes when we consider contentment, we can wrongly think that to be content we just need to “want” less. I don’t just mean to want less stuff - sometimes it might be good for us to want less stuff or want different stuff. But I mean to desire less as in feel less emotion, or almost numb part of our hearts or experiences. Like maybe if we don’t want too much, or have too high of hopes or desires, then maybe we won’t have feelings of discontentment either if our desires aren’t met.
But this is backwards thinking. Our desire for satisfaction is not the problem. Contentment is not a matter of minimizing our desire to be satisfied. Our hearts are constantly seeking satisfaction because they’re made to. It’s an intentional part of God’s design. So much so that it’s even evident in our physical being and in the design of creation. For instance, we eat and we feel satisfied. Food tastes good - it’s satisfying to our taste and smell. Nature is beautiful and it’s satisfying to us. Seeing the fruit of our labor, working hard, and achieving something, is satisfying. After we work, rest is satisfying. Relationships, emotional, and physical intimacy, are satisfying.
God has designed us this way because it reflects Him. In The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment, Jeremiah Burroughs also says,
“In the strict sense, contentment is only attributed to God, who has styled himself ‘God all-sufficient’, in that he rests fully satisfied in and with himself alone.”
The satisfying aspects that he’s woven into his creation, our desire for satisfaction, it’s made that way because it reflects who He is. He’s the source of satisfaction. And if even the creation is satisfying, how much more so is the Creator Himself.
Discontentment is an issue of misguided desire, not too much desire. It’s looking to the wrong source for real and lasting satisfaction. Psalm 55 says:
“Come, everyone who thirsts, come to the waters, and everyone who has no money, come, buy and eat! Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy?...Incline your ear, and come to me; hear, that your soul may live.”
That whole statement describes satisfaction - come drink, come eat, come to me that your soul may live. What God wants for us is soul-satisfaction. Food satisfies for a while. We can labor for some return, or some satisfaction.But true contentment is about soul-satisfaction, and that’s only met in Him.
So let’s dig into that more in Philippians. Our primary text will be Chapter 4:11-13. This is one of the go-to passages about contentment, because Paul addresses it directly. And he’s writing this about contentment from prison - not likely what we would imagine would lead us to feelings of contentment. Philippians 4:11-13 says:
“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:11-13).
This is a lesson in contentment from Paul, and, in terms of contentment, it’s the goal for us as women of God. So the question is how do we get that?
I think there are a couple of things to press into here. First, Paul says that we are able to be content in all circumstances - the highs, lows, and everything in between. We’re quick to couple contentment with hardship - when something doesn’t feel good, when we’re suffering, that’s when we really have to fight to be content. That’s true and right to do, but it doesn't end there. Paul is saying we can grow discontent in times of abundance and comfortability too. Because we can start to rely less on God, and we start to look to be satisfied elsewhere. Sometimes the more comforts of the world we have, the more comforts of the world we want. But we know that the pleasures of the world won’t ultimately satisfy our hearts. They just can’t. If we’re looking to created things or circumstances to ultimately satisfy us, we will become discontent.
Paul is writing this from prison. On the one hand, we may think, “How could we possibly be content in prison?” But on the other hand, from prison, what else would I have other than you, God? We’re able to be content in all circumstances.
But in order to be content in all circumstances, we have to be willing to submit to God. Submission happens in one of two ways: You either willingly submit, or you’re forced to submit. So to have a heart that willingly and freely submits, you have to understand the secret Paul’s talking about here in Philippians.
Paul says there’s a secret to contentment, and that he has learned this secret. It had to be learned even by Paul, which should tell us something - we need to learn it too, it doesn’t just come naturally. But it can be learned. And to better understand the secret I think it’s helpful to read some of the surrounding text in Philippians 3 and 4 as we build up to this text.
In Philippians 3:1, Paul starts the chapter by saying,
“Finally, my brothers, rejoice in the Lord.”
Rejoice. Or delight you could say. And rejoice in what? In the Lord. This is freeing - we can praise Him no matter where we are or what we face. Because He doesn’t change.
Then in verses 8-9,
“For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith…”(Philippians 3:8-9)
Paul says he’s lost everything and counts it all as rubbish in order to have Christ. And it’s through faith.
And then again in chapter 4:4,
“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice.”
Rejoice. Or delight. Always. Regardless of circumstance, in every situation. Then, in the following verse,
“The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-8).
The Lord is at hand. Do not be anxious about anything. Anxiety breeds discontentment. When God uses such definitive words like - anything, everything, all things, at all times – God really means it. It’s not like us, where we exaggerate or say statements like, “I always do that.” Well, I probably don't always, right? But it’s not like that with God’s word. He actually means it. So when we read that we can be content in all things, we really can be. We’re still sinful. We don’t do it perfectly, but that should tell us that the power to do it is not from us. It’s His power. We can seek Him for it.
And in everything, we can bring our desires to God. There’s nothing we can’t bring to him. And then when we do bring them to him, we can submit them to Him. We don’t get the peace of God without willing submission. If we cling onto things, then we can’t trust God with them. And if we can’t entrust them to Him, how can we receive the peace that comes from knowing they’re in His hands? We submit because we know that God is in control, and we can trust Him because He’s good.
So in freely submitting these things to Him, we receive the peace of God which will guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. That’s what produces that quiet inward spirit that Jeremiah Burroughs talked about. That’s the peace of God. And through what means? In Christ Jesus.
Then in Philippians 4:6-8 Paul says,
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”
That’s Jesus. These are attributes of God, and the culmination of these things is in Jesus. To fix our minds on these things is to set our gaze on Jesus.
And then finally, with all of that as our backdrop, we then get to our main text:
“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” (Philippians 11-13).
How does Paul say that He can do all of these things? Through Christ. That’s the secret. I am convinced, Paul says. He’s become convinced. He’s learned the secret of contentment. It’s Jesus. Because of Him, we can learn in whatever situation we are to be content. We can be brought low or abound. We can face plenty or hunger, abundance or need. We can do all things through him who strengthens us, because all of our needs are met in Him. We’re made to be satisfied in Him and Him alone.
It makes me think of Psalm 27, one of my favorite passages. Verse 4 says,
“One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after...” – one thing – “...that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord, and to inquire in His temple.”
That's the ultimate desire. To know Him. To delight in Him. And He’s the ultimate desire because He’s the ultimate satisfaction. That’s where our initial question comes in - what is it that we truly want? What do I desire most? I most ultimately desire you, God. Help me to keep that at the forefront of my mind and heart. Help me to remember where my satisfaction lies, and to see clearly. To know you and to seek you.
And when we are in that frame of mind and heart, we can say, like Psalm 73,
“There is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.”
Like Psalm 27:4,
“One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after.”
And like Paul says in Philippians 3:8,
“I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.”
That’s Paul’s ultimate desire. To know Christ. Because he knows He’s worth more than anything. The root of discontentment isn’t about the things we have or don’t have, or our circumstances. Ultimately, contentment is a byproduct of what we believe about God.
Paul wasn’t overlooking circumstances, or numbing emotions, or minimizing suffering - he endured great suffering. And that didn’t feel good. Contentment doesn’t necessarily mean we’re going to feel good. It’s not even necessarily a matter of happiness. We may not like our circumstances. And that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t ask God for what we want. Jesus said time and time again throughout the gospels, ask God. Ask for what you want and desire. Jesus even asked in the Garden of Gethsemane, before He was going to be crucified, if there was any other way. But then what did he say? Not my will but yours be done (Matt. 24:39, 42). He submitted to the Father. And died. And carried out the will of God, and the greatest plan of all of time.
And Paul is able to say the things he’s saying here because he believed this whole-heartedly - that the worth of Jesus, and what He did on the cross, for us, is surpassing. Jesus is greater. It’s not a minimizing of anything else, it’s letting Jesus trump everything else. That’s why Paul was able to learn the secret - because he held dearly to Jesus, at all times, no matter what was at hand.
True contentment is based on the promises of God that are ours in Christ. Romans 5:8 says,
“But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Jesus did it. It’s finished, done for us. We’re forgiven, and we’ll live forever with Him, and it’s given to us for free. What could ever satisfy us more?
A few chapters later Paul writes this,
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?...No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:35-39)
We’re not content based on the situation, we’re content because all of our needs are met in Christ. Nothing and no one else can do that for us. And nothing in all of creation can separate us from Him. That makes us delight in Him. That’s why we can rejoice always. And if that’s the secret, I want to learn this practice of contentment. I want to set my mind on Him, let Jesus outweigh my circumstances, or thoughts, or emotions, because he does, by far.
Learning to do this isn’t just a one-and-done kind of thing, like now we have the answer, the secret, and now we’ve arrived at contentment. It’s a secret because few actually truly find it. I think that’s probably why Jeremiah Burroughs’ calls contentment a ‘rare jewel.” But, again, we are able to learn it. We have all we need to learn it. It’s fixing our minds on Jesus. Desiring him most, submitting to God’s will, delighting in who He is, and if we do these things, ultimately we find our satisfaction in Him.
And that’s my hope for all of us. That we’d be women whose faith is tried and true in this way, and that could be able to join Paul in saying, “I’ve learned in whatever situation I am to be content…I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Personal Reflection
1. In what areas of your life do you most struggle to be content? Choose 1-2 areas you’d like to focus on specifically.
2. How are the following factors affecting your contentment in these areas: desire, submitting to God, delighting in God, satisfaction?
3. Read the following passages and record your thoughts as you read them: Philippians 3:1, 3:7-9; Philippians 4:1, 4:6-8; 4:12-13. Consider what contentment in Christ is like, and why true contentment is only found through salvation in Jesus.
4. How can you apply what God teaches us in Philippians about contentment to your own life? Try to be specific.