Strength In Our Weakness
Crash, a wave swept over my head. Down I sank. My feet touched the bottom of the wave pool and I pushed off to reach the surface of the water. Crash. Another wave. My nose smarted. I started to sink to the bottom again. My lungs ached. Again, I kicked upwards. My head broke the surface. I gasped for air. Instead, I was inundated with water as another wave to sweep over me. “Oxygen!” My brain screamed. Panic filled me. I wondered if I could reach the surface. My nine-year-old self didn’t feel strong enough to fight the current and swells. Then, I felt a hand on my arm. A powerful grip thrust me toward the surface of the wave pool.
Have you ever felt like this? I don’t mean in a wave pool or the ocean for that matter, but emotionally and spiritually. Have the cares, struggles, and sorrows of life in a dying world ever crashed over you again and again and again, leaving you weak and panicked? Loss, sickness, abandonment, and broken relationships can leave us unsure of how to keep walking through each day. Last year I lost my first sweet baby. In the wake of this loss I have been pushed to the limits of my strength and often unsure if I would ever come up for air. But God has never been far. Here is what he has been teaching me through this last season:
1. My Weakness is God’s Mercy
When talking of God, David says, “You hem me in, behind and before, you lay your hand upon me.” (Psalm 139:5) The word for “hem” here is almost always used as a military term throughout the Old Testament. It portrays the idea of a city under siege. Often physical, emotional, and spiritual weakness surround us like armies ready to crumble us. Yet, we see in Psalm 139 that it is God who hems us in. Does God mean to crumble us to pieces? No, God has graciously created us with limits, highlighting our need for him. Jesus says, “Come to me all who are weak and heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 6:28). He doesn’t call all who are strong and wise, but those who are weak and broken. Sister, your weakness in the wake of struggle is God’s mercy because it illuminates your need for him. Only he can give true peace and rest.
2. In Weakness, He Never Lets Go
In suffering and loss, our hold on God and his promises can often feel weak. Yet when we are weak, his hold on us never wavers. Psalm 94:18-19 says, “When I thought, “My foot slips,” your steadfast love, O Lord, held me up. When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.” When sorrows and sufferings weigh us down, it is God’s faithfulness alone that is our hope. He has promised to love us. He has promised to comfort us. He has promised to never leave us. If my nine-year-old self in the wave pool had known that my friend was close by with her hand outstretched to pull me out of the water, I would not have panicked at the waves. In the same way, as waves of suffering and sorrow roll over us, our faithful God will never release his powerful, sustained grip on his daughters. He will hold us and guide us until every sorrow is turned to joy. What a day that will be!